Brent Alexander

serving up perspective //

smashing the doubt

Category: Personal Growth

Browse the Personal Growth category for ideas on mindset, resilience, and self-improvement. Find actionable insights to help you grow on and off the court.

The Change Is In The Challenge
There’s a special kind of satisfaction that comes from seeing a project through to the end, especially when it doesn’t go as planned. I recently tackled a home repair DIY project that turned out to be more of an adventure than I’d bargained for. What started as a simple task—replacing a rotten wall panel and some insulation—quickly spiraled into something much bigger:
- Replacing all the insulation
- Re-running electrical wiring
- Removing old newspaper insulation under the window sill
- Spraying foam sealant
- Caulking the outside brick
- Adding nail-stopper plates
- Then finally replacing the wall panel
It was messy, unexpected, and honestly, overwhelming at times. But finishing it felt incredible because the challenge forced me to adapt, learn, and grow.

summer wanted to help but she didn’t know the difference between a pry bar and a wrecking bar. and has no thumbs.

it got messy quickly

the extent of thee water damage

they used newspaper as insulation! 😱

dated Nov. 5, 1970

front page of the newspaper

I’m no electrician but this doesn’t seem right. 🤨

also this…

i could clearly see daylight to the outside! no good!

QUAD to the rescue!

we call it good.

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The Metaphor: Therapy Is Like a DIY Project

Therapy is like a DIY project—messy, unpredictable, and life-changing.

Home repairs, as it turns out, are a perfect metaphor for therapy. Just like peeling back a wall reveals hidden issues, opening yourself up in therapy can expose complexities you didn’t anticipate. What you thought was one “rotten panel” might be layers of unresolved emotions, unexamined beliefs, or buried experiences.

And let’s be honest: that can be terrifying. Not only do you have to confront the work itself, but you also face the uncertainty of what lies beneath. Therapy often means diving into unknown territory—places you’ve never explored.

But here’s the thing: the first time you face those fears is the hardest. Each time after that? It gets a little easier. What once felt impossible starts to feel doable.

The Transformation

Better than before!

That’s the beauty of the work. Therapy takes what feels overwhelming and makes it manageable. Over time, the things you once avoided become things you conquer. They might even become things you enjoy.

And the best part? It’s life-changing. When you look back, you realize how far you’ve come and wonder, “How was I ever afraid of THAT?” The change is in the challenge.

Ready to Start?

If you’re in the Greenville, SC area and looking for a therapist, I can’t recommend Greenville Counseling Associates enough. If you’re elsewhere, Psychology Today and BetterHelp are great places to start your journey.

Because just like that DIY project, you’re capable of more than you know–and the reward is worth the effort.
January 14, 2025
Running Into The New Year

Running into 2025 with my head up, eyes forward, and heart open—and I’m not looking back for a second. 🏃🏻‍♂️💨

This year, I’m saying farewell to the me I’ve outgrown, celebrating the me I’ve rediscovered, and embracing the anticipation of the me I’m yet to know.

2025 is my year to conquer new challenges, starting with running my first half marathon. This time last year, I had only ever run 5Ks, never daring to call myself a distance runner. But everything changed when my wife challenged me to run the Greenville Trees Upstate Turkey Day 8K. I accepted—and crushed it. It wasn’t so bad after all, so I leveled up to a 10K. Now, with a 10-miler just 30 days away and my first half marathon in 60, I’ve gone from hesitant to hooked.

They call it the “running bug” for a reason. There’s nothing quite like the rush of crossing a finish line, the dopamine hit that floods your system, and the satisfaction of crushing a goal you once thought impossible. It’s euphoric. And I’m here for all of it this year—chasing the real dopamine, the kind that fuels growth, resilience, and self-discovery.

But this journey is about more than just running; it’s about pushing the limits I never thought I could challenge. Growing up, I wasn’t much of an athlete. Between mild asthma, outdoor allergies, and a chronic heart condition called Aortic Stenosis (a narrowing of the aortic valve that can limit blood flow and endurance), I was always told to “take it easy.” Physical activity was something I approached with caution, never pushing too hard or taking risks.

Movement is Medicine.

Ironically, it’s only by stepping outside those limits that I’ve become the healthiest version of myself. As I’ve increased my physical activity, my cardio fitness has soared. My resting heart rate is the lowest it’s ever been, and my HRV (heart rate variability)—a measure of my body’s resilience and recovery—is the highest it’s ever been. Beyond the physical benefits, running has transformed my mental health. It’s my stress reliever, mood booster, and a time for clarity and reflection.

In my upper 30s, I’m acutely aware of how important it is to stay active as I age. Movement is my medicine. I want to feel this good not just now but decades from now. When I’m twice my age, I want to be strong, mobile, and capable—not confined to a chair.

So here’s the plan for my half marathon:

1️⃣ Goal #1 is simply to finish.

2️⃣ Goal #2 is to finish with a sub-12-minute mile pace (or under 2:37 overall).

And if I don’t? It won’t be a failure; it’ll be a stepping stone for whatever challenge comes next.

Growth happens on the other side of comfort.

Limits exist to be pushed. Growth happens on the other side of comfort. And this year, I’m choosing to be uncomfortable in the best ways possible.

Here’s to running into the new year with purpose, passion, and perseverance. Join me on the journey—it’s going to a maratahon–not a sprint! 🏃‍♂️✨

January 3, 2025
Rekindling The Love of Words: My Journaling Journey

keeping a journal is something i never kept up with until this year. i’ve never considered myself a wordsmith, but maybe a logophile—a lover of words. and this year, i’ve rekindled that love.

i remember the pre-social media days of livejournal and xanga. every band, every tv show, had its own forum or message board. it’s like the internet could only handle so much, and that was all we needed.

back then, i honed my creativity, but it was surface-level. i only scratched the surface of who i was. today, with more self-awareness and self-acceptance, i can express what i couldn’t in those early days.

there’s something beautiful about the lofi nature of words in a high-fidelity world of tik tok reels, youtube videos, netflix, and endless noise. it feels cozy, intimate. like wrapping up in a blanket by a warm fire.

i don’t journal every day, but i do it more often than not. and that’s something.

here’s to writing more words in 2025. ✍🏻

December 31, 2024
A Celebration of Possibility

“All endings are also beginnings. We just didn’t know it at the time.”

— Mitch Albom

The Five People You Meet in Heaven

Today we helped my wife’s sister and her husband move into their new home.

Moving signifies embarking on a new chapter. One door closes, and another one opens. It’s a tangible reminder that life is full of opportunities for growth and transformation. It’s a celebration of what’s possible. The future is wide open with every new step. There’s always room for growth, change, and the unexpected.

The transition from one stage to the next is often laborious. It’s easy to beat yourself up for forgetting where you packed things. And it may take longer than you originally planned. And it will definitely cost more (everyone thinks they are wiser than they really are). But the key that unlocks the door to the next chapter is only found when you release the old one.

Is it a risk? You bet. When you sell the house in which you currently reside, you’re putting your faith and hope in the fact that you have another one ready. But sometimes life has other plans. Sometimes plan A falls through and plan B is living with your parents until your new house is finished. It takes trust, patience, and stick-to-it-iveness. Heaps of it.

But then, the day finally comes and it’s time turn the page. And it’s rewarding. And exciting. And, ever so slowly, all of that stress and anxiety that used to keep you up at night starts to drift away. And you look back and reflect and think about just how far you have come.

New things are new because they are unmarred.

One could say they are perfect.

But they are also blank.

Empty.

Lifeless.

Full of possibility.

A new chapter is a celebration.

A celebration of possibility.

December 22, 2024
Don’t Think. Just Do.

Limits are meant to be pushed. Whether it’s speed, fear, or doubt, the barriers in front of us are only as permanent as we allow them to be.

A “top gun” doesn’t back down because the odds are stacked against him—he thrives because he trusts his training, his instincts, and his relentless drive to succeed. That’s a lesson for all of us. You don’t have to wait to feel “ready.” You don’t need to be the best to start. What matters is taking the first step and believing in your ability to rise.

“Don’t think, just do.” Those four words encapsulate what it takes to break through fear and hesitation. Courage isn’t the absence of fear—it’s action in spite of it. Every great achievement begins with someone daring to step into discomfort, to face the unknown.

In life, you can be sure that you will face challenges that test you, voices that doubt you, and moments when quitting feels easier than continuing. But the only way to truly grow is to embrace the process and push through the turbulence.

Your mission isn’t just about skill—it’s about mindset. Trust your instincts. Trust the work you’ve put in. Trust the vision you’re chasing, even if others can’t see it yet. Obstacles will come, but they’re there to refine you, not define you. Keep showing up. Keep giving it everything you’ve got. When you do, you’ll find that limits begin to crumble, and the horizon gets just a little closer.

You don’t have to know exactly how the story ends. What matters is flying your own mission, on your own terms. Because at the end of the day, it’s not just about winning—it’s about living boldly, pushing boundaries, and refusing to let fear clip your wings.

The sky was never the limit—it’s just the beginning. All you have to do is take off.

December 14, 2024

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